No, not the big three oh. Did that all ready, back in December. No big deal. Although for some weird reason it just seemed odd I reached that age. Not that I live a dangerous lifestyle or anything but it was just…odd. But anyway, its the big three. My son is now three years old(and a few days at this point). Seems like it was the the other day that he came home from the hospital and yet its like he’s always been here with us. Hard to remember a time when he wasn’t part of the family.
Weird thing is I never thought I wanted kids. No desire to continue the line, no need for little me’s. I married a woman who all ready had three children and that was fine. Got to miss all the diaper duty, sleepless nights and vomited on clothes that comes with an infant. Works for me. But then an accident happened(as they will) and oh hey, here’s a baby. No I never wanted a child but when they handed him to me in the delivery room, I sure as hell wasn’t going to give him back. That’s when it really becomes real for a father and I was lost as soon as I looked down at that tiny dude and those little eyes. This was my son.
And now its three years later. Man the changes. Its not always as noticeable when you are with them day to day but every so often I look back at old pictures and…fuck. He’s bigger and he’s walking and jumping and we can even converse with him. Although when he’s excited the words get all jumbled and he has to be calmed down. (I get the same way but it usually involves booze.) He’s the cock of the walk and the king of the jungle and sometimes he falls and hurts a knee or arm or his head and comes running up for hugs and kisses and snuggles to make it feel better. He’s independent minded and stubborn and brave when Daddy is standing beside him cause then he can do anything.
He’s my baby boy and my little big man and always will be. It is quite true that children change you. But instead of adding anything, its more that a child will reveal what was always there.
Love you baby boy.